So much on my mind.

I've realized that all I do is wish and dream and want for good things to happen, but I don't actually put an effort into making things better.
I've tried and failed many times, so I guess somewhere along the way I just completely gave up.
Life is all about trial and error, but I've realized that I can't just give up.
If I give up, then I'll be miserable forever, and that's the last thing I want. That's the last thing I need.

I've spent my life caring so much about others that I completely forgot about myself. I can't even take care of myself, and that is [beyond] not okay.
I am the happiest I've been in a long time this summer, but I am also really very miserable with lots of things right now. I've spent a great deal of this year trying to turn my life around, better myself, and "find myself."
I'm still working on it.

I can't exactly figure it out, but there is an empty space that needs to be filled. Part of me feels like the luckiest girl in the world because I got what I've wanted for so long.
But then part of me feels completely ... incomplete. What is missing?

I keep telling myself that there is still time. Maybe it's possible that I have changed, even just a little, and the changes I have been going through aren't completely finished.
I often find myself contemplating giving up. But I'm trying to enjoy life and everything it is giving me and just letting whatever comes my way - come my way.

I'm not expecting myself to be completely healed and happy and just all-around different overnight.
I think I can wait for that. I've waited this long, and I'm certain it will all be worth the wait.

Some things are completely and utterly amazing right now.
As for everything else, I have all the hope in the word that it will happen one day.